Cubby Trauma is a new phrase I have coined. It's a description of people's reaction to Cubby the first time they see him in action. The symptoms are something like shell shock, I think.
Actually, it's more like the first time they see him in action and in full voice. Both of which he is at all times. He moves non-stop. He talks non-stop. He notices everydamnthing and asks questions constantly about those things. He has a huge vocabulary, excellent pronunciation, and a surprisingly wide range of knowledge.
He is, in short, precocious. Also exhausting.
The most recent sufferer of Cubby Trauma is our pediatrician. I took Cubby in for his three-year check-up today. The doctor walked in and spent the next two minutes listening to the Cubby and Mommy question and answer session that continues all day long:
"Where did the doctor come from?" "From the hallway."
"What was he doing out there?" "He was probably in his office."
"Why does he have an office?" "So he can do paperwork."
"Like Daddy. What's that?" "Paper towels."
"For what?" "To dry your hands after you wash them."
"Why do you wash your hands?" "Why do you think?"
"Because they get dirty. Where's the stethoscope?"
And on and on and on and on and on . . .
Once the doctor closed his mouth that I'm pretty sure was hanging open in surprise, he said that Cubby seemed ready for kindergarten. Then he looked at the computer and realized that this child is three years old. Three.
Which is when the doctor remarked that I might find it a little difficult with Cubby before he started school*.
Straight from the medical professional, ladies and gentlemen.
Cubby weighs 34.5 pounds and I have no idea how tall he is since at that juncture in the measurements I was focusing on keeping Charlie from vaulting off the exam table he was lying on. We'll have to re-measure him at home.
Then, to celebrate Cubby's good health (and good behavior, because he was actually very well-behaved, just loquacious as always), we went to get french fries at Wendy's.
Okay, so the french fries were for me as much as him. But whatever. A good time was had by all.
* Thanks to Cubby's February birthday, he will not start kindergarten for TWO AND A HALF MORE YEARS. Help.